Wednesday, October 26, 2005
Tribute to Girls (Mad Libs of Laurie's Story)
So, I kept bugging myself to post to this blog, and after 7 scotch and tonics I drunkenly decided to write to myself. Since I'm not really funny when I drink, I am going to try my best not to vomit all over my keyboard.
I think time should be taken to remember the gems the apartment that only Strulson saw -- the girls that swallowed everything. I think girls purposely suggested seeing Strulson's collection of horrible movies in his bedroom for the first date in hopes of luring him to bed so they could end up being stuck with the mark of Strulson.
After many years of abuse at Etown, I believe girls sought justice by sucking up anything that got near it. If you couldn't find the remote you would have to stick your entire arm into the girls to find it (as well as 20 packages of Twizzlers, 5 back issues of the Etownian, and Strulson). The fondest memory I have of girls was when they let me down. The fateful day was in Apt. 255 and I was putting my coat on to go out. I am the first to admit I am not the most graceful person, so in the process of walking towards the door, I got my feet tangled up in Strulson. As I started to fall head first towards a pile of Strulson's girls, I took solace in the fact that Strulson has never thrown anything off of himself; I would comfortably hit him and would need the jaws of life to get me back out. However, on this fateful day as I was tangled in my coat and Strulson's boobies, I landed on the girls for a split second before I was slammed onto the floor. I believe this was when girls were in their last days at Apt. 255 - so I'm sure it knew the dumpster death they awaited and that you can't take anything with you when you go to the beyond.
I think time should be taken to remember the gems the apartment that only Strulson saw -- the girls that swallowed everything. I think girls purposely suggested seeing Strulson's collection of horrible movies in his bedroom for the first date in hopes of luring him to bed so they could end up being stuck with the mark of Strulson.
After many years of abuse at Etown, I believe girls sought justice by sucking up anything that got near it. If you couldn't find the remote you would have to stick your entire arm into the girls to find it (as well as 20 packages of Twizzlers, 5 back issues of the Etownian, and Strulson). The fondest memory I have of girls was when they let me down. The fateful day was in Apt. 255 and I was putting my coat on to go out. I am the first to admit I am not the most graceful person, so in the process of walking towards the door, I got my feet tangled up in Strulson. As I started to fall head first towards a pile of Strulson's girls, I took solace in the fact that Strulson has never thrown anything off of himself; I would comfortably hit him and would need the jaws of life to get me back out. However, on this fateful day as I was tangled in my coat and Strulson's boobies, I landed on the girls for a split second before I was slammed onto the floor. I believe this was when girls were in their last days at Apt. 255 - so I'm sure it knew the dumpster death they awaited and that you can't take anything with you when you go to the beyond.
# posted by Jake and Elspeth @ 11:16 AM 
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I was so mad at you for doing this... untill i read it. As a guy that followed up on a few of strulsons girls i'd like to say the following: You prolly could stick you whole arm in some of strulson's girls... and when you do you will be lucky if 20 packages of Twizzlers, and 5 back issues of the Etownian are the only thing you find there.... that is where he stores things for the long winter.
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